Wouldn't It Be Luverly

I was watching the CNN coverage of Saddam Hussein's trial this evening when I came to the conclusion that it would be hilarious if they found him innocent of all charges. At least I would be laughing.

Anyway, we all know that this trial is just for show and that he is going to be found guilty no matter what. So why are we bothering? Let's spare the time and money and just, you know, lock him in a nice, quiet room somewhere with some puppies and knitting.

This trial is a farce. They aren't even trying to give it the semblance of a real legal procedure. Since when was it acceptable to deprive a prisoner of his lawyer at an arraignment? I've watched enough episodes of Law and Order to know that you can't try somebody without gathering evidence. I'll admit, this is a special case since most of the crimes he's been charged with have pretty much been documented in the public eye. However, as far as I know, they haven't even found any witnesses willing to testify. Why? Because if they do, they will get their asses blown to kingdom come in a suicide-bombing. Or be decapitated. Yes, good start.

Liberty and Justice for all, my non-existant Asian ass.

As for the charges themselves, I think they're kind of funny. My favourite is the one about invading Kuwait without provocation. Without provocation. Yes, without provocation. Sound familiar? I DON'T KNOW!!!!

It's pretty bad to admit this, but at this point I'm impressed with Saddam. I am more impressed with a brutal dictator instead of the champions of liberty and the forces of good. I am impressed with his defiance. I am impressed with the fact that he is still fighting even though he knows that he has lost. Maybe it's because he knows he's already lost. He has nothing else to lose. But man, that is courage. Bloodthirsty despot or no, standing up to the fucking world hegemon is courage:

"This is all a theater" designed by President Bush, whom he called a criminal, to win re-election, said Saddam, looking around the court with a half-smile during one outburst.

Bush on Thursday had no reaction to that comment, according to White House Press Secretary Scott McClellan.

Of course you have no reaction. None at all.

Whatever. What do I know? I'm an impotent seventeen-year-old. It's not my damn country anyway. In true seventeen-year-old style, I'd like to quote my favourite ambiguously-gay gloomy new-wave music icon, Morrissey: "Bush should have died, not Reagan."

Somebody had to say it.

VIVA LES PRETZELS!!!!!

Listening to: "Glitterball" by Seachange